In a recent post on Imamother about how in just 5 months of marriage, the poster and her (mostly in Kollel) husband were in debt an anonymous poster wrote the following:

Wow I am so impressed with how people really live frugally. I am not the op but I wish I could do the same. I know that I spend way too much money but my dh would never listen to me if I tell him that we should cut down. Do people really not serve meat or chicken every night for supper? My dh would kill me if I just served him macaroni.

I have to say I am flabbergasted that people can be so pettystupidselfishblind.

Last week my husband and I sat down with all our bills and our bank statements and using Google Docs we made several spread sheets with regards to our finances.

After looking things over we decided we needed to cut down our grocery budget and the main way we were going to do that was to pretty much cut out chicken and meat during the week and limit the fish to canned tuna.

This week's menu was: Sunday we had HOMEMADE lentil burgers and baked ziti. On Monday we had potato latkes and fresh salad. Tuesday was a thick veggie-barley soup and Wednesday I bought a package of kebabs, cut them into bit sized pieces and added that to the soup. So we had meatball soup. Not sure what we'll be having tonight. (Here in Israel, dairy tends to also be crazy expensive. Ingredients for lasagna for 6 is 50NIS or more in just cheeses. Also by 'we' I mean my husband and myself, our 2 1/2 year old son and on Tuesday my 18 year old daughter)

Would I prefer fried chicken and entrecot steak? Of course.

But I also would prefer a roof over my head.

I really think that anyone who claims that their spouse will 'kill them' if they served mac and cheese for dinner needs to sit down with said homicidal spouse and plan the budget. If smacked with the cold hard facts that chicken every night is simply out of touch with the budgetary reality, I highly doubt your spouse will want to kill you.

From a post on Imamother. Wanted to save it here. (None of these are mine and I haven't tried any of them yet).

Honey Barbecued Chicken with Sweet Potatoes
3 cups peeled and sliced sweet potatoes, about 2 medium-large sweet potatoes
1 cup (8 oz.) pineapple chunks in juice, undrained
¼ cup finely chopped onion
½ tsp ground ginger
2/3 cup thick barbecue sauce
4 Tbsp. honey
1 tsp dry mustard
4 to 6 chicken leg quarters, skin removed

In 3½ to 5 quart slow cooker, combine sweet potatoes, pineapple with juice, chopped onion, and ground ginger. Stir to blend well.
In a measuring cup, combine barbecue sauce, honey, and dry mustard. Stir with a fork to blend well.
Coat chicken generously on all sides with barbecue sauce mixture. Arrange coated chicken in single layer over sweet potato and pineapple mixture, overlapping if necessary. Spoon any remaining barbecue sauce mixture over chicken.
Cover; cook on LOW for 7 to 9 hours (or on HIGH for 4 to 4½) or until chicken is fork tender and juices run clear, and sweet potatoes are tender.

Crockpot Balsamic Chicken
Chicken
4 chicken legs, skinned
1 very large Spanish onion, chopped (I like to add more - they come out like sauteed onions)

Dressing (this is approximate amounts, just make a dressing and taste - season generously with salt)
4 Tbsp Balsamic vinegar
2 Tbsp olive oil, optional
1 Tbsp garlic powder or 4 cloves garlic, crushed
salt to taste

Rice
1 cup white rice
2½ cups boiling water
2 tsp Kosher salt OR 1 tsp table salt

Place chopped onion on bottom of crockpot; place chicken on top in a single layer, overlapping if necessary.
Combine balsamic vinegar, optional olive oil, garlic powder and salt in a plastic cup. Pour evenly over chicken.
Cook on low for 8 hours or on HIGH for 4 hours.

When you come home:
One full hour before chicken is ready, pour rice, boiling water from tea kettle, and salt into a crockpot liner/bag. Tie the bag with a knot. Place bag on top of chicken in crockpot. Cover crockpot and continue to cook on HIGH for 1 hour.
To serve, pour sauce and onions from bottom of crockpot over rice, and serve with chicken.

(This puffed white rice method works great with any crock pot recipe. It comes out perfectly puffed, no mushiness at all.)

Shredded Beef Buns these are really good

1 lb. flanken
1 small onion, sliced
1 cup mushrooms, sliced
1 medium tomato, chopped
½ cup original bar-b-q sauce (use a thick sauce, not a liquidy version)
2 tsp Italian seasoning spice
2 sandwich buns, split (French or Italian baguettes work great.)

Place steak in slow cooker; top with onions, mushrooms and tomatoes.
Combine bar-b-q sauce and Italian seasoning; pour over ingredients in slow cooker. Cover with lid.
Cook on LOW for 8-10 hours or on HIGH for 5 hours.

Remove steak from slow cooker; shred with fork or cut across the grain into thin strips.
Return steak to slow cooker; stir gently to evenly coat with sauce.
Place 1 bun half on each of 4 serving plates; top evenly with the steak mixture.

You can use any variety of meat cuts. Less expensive meat cuts benefit most form this cooking method.

Garlic Chicken
4-6 chicken bottoms with skin
1 large or 2 small onions, sliced
1 Tbsp olive oil
2 tsp kosher salt
2 tsp paprika
1/2 tsp pepper
4 garlic cloves, halved

Place onion slices on the bottom of crockpot.
In a large mixing bowl, toss chicken parts with olive oil, salt, paprika, pepper, and garlic. Pour into crockpot, on top of the onion.
Do not add water.
Cover and cook on low for 8 hours, or on high for 4 hours.
(Original recipe calls for 20 whole garlic cloves, still intact. Also so delicious.)

USE THE RICE IN THE CROCKPOT BAG METHOD FOR THIS RECIPE.
(The reason rice is not added under the chicken in these two recipes is because the onions on bottom become butter soft and very tastey. The rice would interfere with that, and the taste would come out too strong. Buy making plain puffed rice, you get to top it with the delicious onions and sauce.)

Chicken Curry
4 chicken bottoms, legs and thighs separated
2 Idaho potatoes, peeled and cut into 1-inch cubes
10 baby carrots, sliced, or 2 carrots, peeled and sliced
1 large onion, halved and sliced
3 Tbsp olive oil
2 tsp curry powder
2 tsp ground cumin
3 cloves garlic, minced
2 tsp fresh minced ginger
2 tsp kosher salt
1/2 tsp black pepper
1/2 cup water

Place 1/2 cup water on bottom of crockpot.
In a large mixing bowl, toss chicken, potatoes, baby carrots and onions, with olive oil, curry powder, cumin, garlic, ginger, salt and pepper. Pour everything besides chicken into crockpot. Place chicken on top.
Cover and cook on low for 8 hours, or on high for 4 hours.

Saucy Meatballs
At the beginning of the week, or the night before, cook 1 package spaghetti as directed on package; drain. Drizzle with a drop of oil. Place in sealed container or Ziplock bag and keep in fridge until ready to serve with meatballs.

3/4 cup bread crumbs seasoned generously to taste
1½ lbs. lean ground meat
1 egg, lightly beaten
½ cup water
2 cups sliced mushroom
2 medium green peppers, sliced (about 2 cups)
4 cups (32 jar) spaghetti sauce

Combine bread crumbs, spices to taste, meat, egg and water. Shape into 1-inch balls. Place in slow cooker, top with mushrooms, peppers, and spaghetti sauce. Cover with lid.
Cook on LOW for 6 to 8 hours, or on HIGH for 3 to 4 hours.
Serve over spaghetti.

Threads on Imamother often become fodder in blogs, mostly due to the naive, stupid, ridiculous and downright moronic attitudes expressed in posts. I myself will often post about a particularly annoying one in a different blog. Often I'll read a thread and wonder how these women ever manage to find their way out of bed in the morning.

But every now and again, someone will post a thread or pose a question that inspires... and I'm not just talking about the recipes.

Imamother is set up as a multilevel forum. You've got the threads that anyone can see, one doesn't need to be a member. Then there are the sections where one must be signed in in order to read the threads and finally there are 'usergroups', which require permission to join, even once you are a member. One of those user groups is called Life in Israel. And I have to say, for the most part, the threads posted there are thoughtful and the women who post, although we run the gamut Hashkafically and politically, there is very little snarking that goes on and for the most part we all get along... we even have the most real-life meetups I think of the entire board.

A few days ago, a woman posted in the LiI section, asking for a spreadsheet program because she wanted to start budgeting. I recommended GoogleDocs and now the thread is over 40 posts strong and it has inspired several members to follow suit. We've been discussing the pros and cons of Hora'ot Kevah (automatic bill payments) via credit card vs the bank, the difference between a credit card and a debit card (NOT an automatic thing here in Israel) and the monthly government children stipend (which I see now has a thread all its own).

Another thread started is where to grocery shop for the best bargains, yet another is simply how to save at the Makolet, dairy shopping, meat shopping, buying grains...

I just want to say that for all the knocks Imamother gets (and again, I'll admit to being guilty of this), I'm glad to see at least some of us are trying to see beyond what theme we should do for Mishloach Manot or complaining about our cleaning lady and trying to be responsible in what we all know will be a difficult economic time.

So there we were, three lactating Mommas (me with my 10 1/2 month old, another woman with her 1 1/2 year old and the third with her 6 month old) enjoying a warm day in Jerusalem, sitting at the outdoor tables of a felafel joint.

Us with our bottles of water and our babies discretely at our breasts.

When I noticed a woman sitting at a table down from us take out her camera and turn it in our direction...

Do I give her the benefit of the doubt that she snapped a photo of the street traffic behind me?

(And just for the record, the three of us are Orthodox Jewish women... skirts, my two friends in long sleeves, I was in a tshirt and had the baby in his wrap and we all wore our hair covered - me with a head scarf, another with a snood and the third in a (obvious) wig).

A woman on Imamother brings the following sources (in italics) to support Rabbi Friedman's argument.

1) Igeres Hakodesh of the Ramban (ch. 5) discusses that thoughts during intimacy affect the form of the sperm (perhaps what's known as DNA today).

Considering that couples going through ART have to have scheduled intercourse, I can honestly say that during those times especially, our thoughts are pretty much solely on the hope that THIS TIME will be the time.

2) Gemarra Brachos (5b) and the Shulchan Aruch discuss the affects that the position of the bed (!) have on the child.

I would heartily agree the position of the bed is important to those of us using ART to conceive our children... how comfortable the stirrups are, the pelvic tilt just so...

3) Siddur Beis Yaakov discusses the affects of both actions and thoughts during intimacy. It's a very popular Seifer, used by both Kallah and Chosson teachers. R' Yaakov Emdin writes there how each aspect of intimacy affects the different senses of the child.
He also writes how sometimes a Jewish soul goes into a non-Jewish body who later converts, just because the parents had the right thoughts during intimacy (and vice versa ch"v).

See #1.

4) Tanya (ch. 2) quotes the Zohar and discusses the power the parents have to give their child better Levushim for the Neshama. These Levushim give the child a stronger character and a better ability to overcome the Yetzer Hara.

Again, see #1.

5) The infamous Bnei 9 Midos, who are children of parents who did not behave properly during intimacy, brought down in many Sefarim, including the Shulchan Aruch. Amongst them are children whose parents hated each other, were drunk, thought about others (fantasized), were thinking of divorce, one was sleeping and more.

If a couple were going through the expense and often indignity of fertility treatments, do you really think they'd be hating one another?

Back in June I posted about an article by Rabbi Manis Friedman about how babies conceived via ART (artificial reproductive technology) are basically spiritually defective

The article, which I had initially read on Imamother, sparked debate, outrage and quite a few hurt feelings. One of the women was kind enough to email Rabbi Friedman and ask for clarification such as did he mean only unmarried women going through ART or did he also mean married couples experiencing infertility.


There's a whole lot of back and forthing in regards to the tone of certain replies, perceived disrespect, an occasional actual opinion and then someone posts (anonymously of course) this:


I could no longer remain silent. I quoted the anonymous post and emphasised " but there is an inyan of having certain kavanos during the conception (I.e. when the men ejacualtes)" in bold and wrote:
 
I actually received a couple compliments (thank you) and then some idiot has the nerve to ask if I'm anti-circ.

And I asked her how she could ask such a ridiculous question of an Orthodox religious woman.

And then the Mod locked the thread. Now on the one hand, warnings had gone out saying that there was a lot of disrespect and that if continued disrespect was posted towards the Rabbi, the thread would be closed. On the other hand.. the disrespect wasn't aimed at the Rabbi.

I'm curious to know if the Mod closed the thread because of my response or to the question itself. I have emailed the mod and asked if I deleted my response and she deleted the anonymous insulting question, would she reopen the thread... I doubt it.